England vs Italy will be a hoot - fans will be hypnotised to believe they are owls

Landlord of the Old Colonial, in Mirfield, Tim Wood.
Landlord of the Old Colonial, in Mirfield, Tim Wood.

Football fans will have a hoot at the expense of Kirklees Council on Saturday as a landlord plans to hypnotise rowdy England fans.

Tim Wood has asked pub regular Brian to hypnotise volunteers at half-time during England’s late-night match against Italy to make them believe they are owls when they leave the pub.

He said: “The fans will go home hooting, which is better than shouting and balling.

“We will send a trigger word to their wives or girlfriends to tell them when they get home so the spell will be broken.”

The idea came to Mr Wood after he received a letter from the council, which warns landlords across the district of possible anti-social behaviour after England games.

Handy hints to keep punters quiet include dishing out lollipops at closing time - at around 1am.

But Mr Wood has gone further by stocking up on all things sweet to turn the Old Colonial in Mirfield into something you’d expect to read about in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

“We have all sorts of sweets for fans,” he said. “Even hot pickled onions on sticks, which look a bit like lollipops.

“I don’t think there will be much rowdiness, but if someone is drunk and falls over in the street, it would be hard to miss them hooting with a Nuclear Apple Chew Bar in their mouth.”

Let us know if you are doing anything special or unusual during England games.

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